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Chapter 3 - A Wild Tale One day, I find myself very old. My wrinkled face is etched with criss-crossing lines and patches of black spots scattering all over. There, my lack lustre eyes with sagging eye bags and a mouth of fallen teeth and wizened chin compliment a hunchbacked! I hold an empty bowl and approach a local chapter of the True Buddha School to beg for some food. The door opens and a follower of the True Buddha School sizes me up. He cannot recognize who I am. "You, old beggar, what do you want?" I wave my empty bowl to signal my hunger. "Sorry old beggar. Everyone is practising at the main hall and no one is in the kitchen." "Are you doing the Padmakumara Yoga Practice?" I ask enthusiastically. The disciple replies, "We no longer practise this Padmakumara Yoga Practice. The Dharma we learn from our Master is transmitted to him from the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas in the heaven. The old practice is long abandoned as it is too slow. The new approach speeds us to attainment." "Ah! What about the golden statue of Padmakumara?" Startled, I ask. "I heard it has been sold to the junk dealer." "Then what are you practising now?" The disciple answers, "We're practising the art of obedience. That is, we obey our Master's every word. Our Master is no longer the Master of the past. He is known as His Eminence, the Deliverer, Living Buddha Great Universal Dharma Light. Now that's some long title." I am shocked upon hearing the news! "Don't you have a lineage guru?" "Our master says that lineage is as good as a sunken ship(in Chinese, the word Lineage rhythms with the words sunken ship). A sunken ship is inauspicious, and thus we need no sunken ship guru, only the Master himself." "Oh! What happen to Sheng-yen Lu?" Startled by my question, the disciple replied, "I heard that ever since he has gone to the South Pacific, his whereabouts is a big mystery and no one knows exactly where he has gone to. Maybe he is gone for good." "How many Masters are that in the True Buddha School now?" I ask again. "About two thousand. They are divided into the Southern Sect, the Northern Sect, the Eastern Sect and the Western Sect. There are also the Black Sect and the White Sect, the Red Sect and the Purple Sect. The Dove Sect and the Hawk Sect" "Enough. Enough. Please stop. Do you know who I am?" "You're an old beggar!" "No! I am Sheng-yen Lu!" I say. The disciple turns around and returns with a group of people. They are screaming and yelling, "There is this stinking and filthy old lonely homeless who claims he is Sheng-yen Lu. He has to be an impostor. Let's get rid of him before he taints the name of True Buddha School." I see the mob surging towards me. This leaves me with no choice but to run for my life.
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